Gert Scholtz

7 years ago · 4 min. reading time · ~100 ·

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Rugby for Bees

Rugby for Bees

Rugby for Bees

From Gert Scholtz and Dean Owen - an irreverent introduction to Rugby. 

To the many soccer fans and football enthusiasts on beBee, we thought to give you an introduction to that greater game of Rugby. The surgical flyhalf Dean, and once “faster than a leopard” Gert, are selecting a beBee rugby team. But first let’s all understand the magic of Rugby.

Rugby officially started at a soccer game at the privileged English school called Rugby. History says a certain young and rebellious William Webb Ellis picked up the ball and decided to push and heave his way through the opposing team. A careful re-examination of the historical facts reveals however, that Ellis in fact did not push through. He gracefully trotted to the goalposts to the frozen astonishment of the other players - at least on Ellis’ first try. On the second, he was mauled, tackled, pulled and pushed and that is when Rugby was actually born.




When you hear: “Crouch, Touch, Pause, Engage”, it is the seductive command from the referee organizing a scrum; the most unique feature of the game. The fixed scrum is where sixteen men first hug their teammates and then bow down and give the other team a big hug too. While they are doing this, the scrumhalf throws the ball between their legs and the teams heave unto their enemy. The loose scrum occurs when the men get tired of all the orderly hugging and brotherly love, and decide to just have a good ruck. They throw themselves onto the hump of players on the ground where yet again they tussle and turn the ball over to their side.

The scrum is a very intimate affair that requires a mutual affinity, especially between the front and second row. The second row is key to maintaining a bind and they do this by sticking their head between two buttocks and reaching with one hand between the legs of the prop and up to grab his waistband. This ensures a tight scrum and no loose bits.




Rugby players come in all shapes and sizes. The larger and heavier are the forwards, and the quicker and more agile players, the backs. Years ago they were the backwards, but players objected saying it sounds too backward, so now we just refer to them as backs. Forwards are those who lie on the ground for most of the match and the backs can be identified by their clean jerseys and well-groomed hair. When not on the field you can spot many backline players on the cover of GQ Magazine.

Every player on the field has a specific job: the scrumhalf throws the ball to the backline, the locks jump for the ball in the lineout, the wings are the last in the backline and run for the try line and the hooker strokes the ball with his feet to his team while scrumming. If this sounds confusing, it is to many players as well.

Scrumhalves are unique: the tiny guy with a big voice and a Napoleon complex – which he needs to fearlessly bark orders to the huge forwards. The locks are the tall guys who are generally also a bit slow. Most of them were fast when younger but years of jamming their heads between the bums of other men eventually takes its toll.

Rugby crowds are, despite the aggressive rough and tumble of the game, surprisingly friendly and peaceful. They often call out: “The ball, the ball!” to remind the players, those who might be in any doubt, of the central object of the game. They joke, banter and unlike soccer crowds, seldom get involved in any physical aggression amongst each other. Where you hear: “Ref, you’re missing a good game!” – be sure it is from a seasoned rugby spectator.




Starting rugby when you are young is a most exciting, and at the same time daunting experience. Dean tells us this: “Playing rugby at school I once fell on a loose ball and through blind ignorance and fear, held on despite a fierce pummeling. It took me months to convince my team mates I was a coward”. 

If you played soccer at school as well, it takes a while to learn that in soccer matches players pretend for 90 minutes that they are hurt while in a rugby match, you pretend for 90 minutes that you are not hurt. And hurt you do!

In contrast to the physical assault of the players, referees are in for a big verbal assault from the typical rugby crowd. At school we both had referees stop games mid-way because of all the heckling coming from parents (of course not our parents). The second half of a rugby game feels much longer than the first. This is often due to a late re-start but more often because of the unfitness of a referee. 

Gert’s most severe penalty on the rugby field came from him tackling the referee by mistake. Grimacing, the ref hobbled off the field to be replaced by one of the teachers. For reasons unknown Gert was missing from school for a week.

Few would dispute that the All Blacks from New-Zealand are the top rugby team in the world. Many will argue about the second place which could be any of England, France, South Africa or Australia. The All Blacks’ supremacy is no doubt because of the blood chilling Haka war cry, and the lack of any equivalent in other countries. Most teams only listen and sing to their national anthem before the game. But think of it; would a player be psyched up for a game when listening to a national anthem about a gracious queen being saved? Or about some or other advance being fair?




We see a gap for the Orange beBee Rugby Team. We will have a war-cry. We will have a fantastic network of players. We will have the three J’s as team managers: Javier Rica, Juan Blanco and Juan Imaz. We will play till the end! We will conquer! We will win! Come see the New-Beeland All Prats play – this Saturday at Orange Park, Spain!



"""""
#Gert #New #Ellis #Rugby #Bees
Comments

Paul Walters

5 years ago #48

Gert Scholtz Oh those bloody All Blacks !!

Randall Burns

5 years ago #47

Great post Gert Scholtz one of my favorite quotes about the game; "American football is a gentlemen's sport played by hooligans whereas Rugby is a Hooligan's sport played by gentlemen'

Ken Boddie

5 years ago #46

Tough b**gers those All Blacks, Gert. Take Brian “Jazz” Muller for example. This famous 1.85m and 110kg tighthead prop became an overnight sensation back in 1967, when the Taranaki Times photographed him, after his debut selection, using his motorised lawn mower, held at full arm’s length, to cut his garden hedge. Having lived in Kiwiland from 1983 to 1988, I soon came to learn that rugby is not a game to the Kiwis. It’s a full blown way of life. On the rare occasion when they lose a match, the whole of New Zealand goes into mourning.

Gert Scholtz

5 years ago #45

Javier \ud83d\udc1d beBee.

Gert Scholtz

5 years ago #44

Javier \ud83d\udc1d beBee.

Gert Scholtz

5 years ago #43

As it is now the peak of the Rugby season in the southern hemisphere, I thought to share again this irreverant introduction to the game. Chris \ud83d\udc1dR Guest

Julio Angel 🐝Lopez Lopez

6 years ago #42

#51
The transformation to boat soon is sublime

Gert Scholtz

6 years ago #41

Debasish Majumder Thanks for sharing this post again. Written more than a year ago when Dean and I had just met on beBee.

Gert Scholtz

6 years ago #40

#49
@Julio Angel \ud83d\udc1dLopez Lopez Serge Blanco was one of the rugby greats. Here is a video of a historic moment for South African rugby: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I-x0oDzz2GU

Debasish Majumder

6 years ago #39

nice post Gert Scholtz both are revered to me and i personally feel more attached to you all. thank you for the share.

Julio Angel 🐝Lopez Lopez

6 years ago #38

Serge Blanco https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GhZqEayR_-A I liked to see that France Congratulations on the article Gert Scholtz

Gert Scholtz

6 years ago #37

#44
Laura Mikolaitis Once you have been close to game and the culture - it is a most enjoyable sport. Thanks for reading Laura and glad it brought good memories.

Gert Scholtz

6 years ago #36

#45
Joyce \ud83d\udc1d Bowen Brand Ambassador @ beBee Glad you enjoyed this older post from Dean and I!

Gert Scholtz

6 years ago #35

#43
Paul \ It was in fact in the 1880s that a rugby player from Yale, Walter Camp, pioneered rule changes that transformed rugby into the new game of American Football. Rugby itself started sixty years before in England. Thanks for stopping by, glad you enjoyed it.

Joyce 🐝 Bowen Brand Ambassador @ beBee

6 years ago #34

My face is nestled in my hands, covering my eyes, in an effort to stifle the images and laughter your post has provoked. I still have a huge smile pasted on my face after wrestling my hands away from my face to type. Thanks for a great post.

Gert Scholtz

7 years ago #33

Dean Owen Well done to England - the first in ten years!

Dean Owen

7 years ago #32

England extend their winning streak with a victory over Springboks - http://www.bbc.com/sport/rugby-union/37950182

Dean Owen

7 years ago #31

With the Rugby Sevens about to kick off in Rio for the first time as an Olympic sport, enjoy this whimsical intro to the World's greatest sport!

Pascal Derrien

7 years ago #30

#37
I used to play on the wing if it does help on the decison making process :-)

Dean Owen

7 years ago #29

#36
Sounds perfect. What position do you fancy? We desperately need a Number 8 and 2 Flankers!

Pascal Derrien

7 years ago #28

Need a bit of french flair in the team combined with some decent irish fightin' spirit :-)

Dean Owen

7 years ago #27

#34
That is the definition of a drop goal!

Ken Boddie

7 years ago #26

Hey great idea! When you've got to go, you've got to go, and nothing will get in your way. Now if you happen to have the ball in your hand when .......... 🏉 🚾#33

Dean Owen

7 years ago #25

#32
Good point! How about Awhina Awhina, Kei hea te wharepaku roughly translated meaning "Help, Help, where is the toilet"

Ken Boddie

7 years ago #24

Hey, Guys, after living in New Zealand for many years, and having held a Kiwi passport prior to taking out Aussie citizenship, probably qualifies me to suggest we need a Haka. Any ideas? Some how "be-Bee-te, be-Bee-te" doesn't have the same ring as "Ka mate, ka mate" (you die, you die)! 😠😠

Dean Owen

7 years ago #23

#30
We just need some heavies now, large, agile, intelligence optional.

Gert Scholtz

7 years ago #22

Antoine Prager The New-Beeland team (name courtesy of Dean Owen) is taking shape! We have Antoine at right-wing, myself at left-wing, Dean at flyhalf and Ken at fullback. Then there are the magnificent three J's as coaches. Paul, any position you would like?

Gert Scholtz

7 years ago #21

#25
Dean Owen What position would you like to play in the New-Beeland team?

Dean Owen

7 years ago #20

#22
Nice Antoine Prager, ever played Eton Fives?

Dean Owen

7 years ago #19

#20
Most recent GQ appearance was the Oct 2014 edition Emilia, no wait, that was my ugly brother Clive. He is a bit of a wimp so never played rugby and became an actor.

Gert Scholtz

7 years ago #18

#22
Antoine Prager Well, I would never have known Spain to have rugby lovers! Thanks for letting me know Antoine. You are definitely on the New-Beeland team.

Gert Scholtz

7 years ago #17

#14
Paul Walters Having lived in England for some years I find myself often rooting for the team. But against the Springboks then I am firmly behind the home team. This coming Saturday going to watch the Boks vs Ireland. Thanks for the interest and comments Paul.

Gert Scholtz

7 years ago #16

#16
Dean Owen No Dean, did you need to remind me of the horrendous (for SA that is) game that was Made in Japan.

Gert Scholtz

7 years ago #15

#12
James McElearney The second spot in the world is where most of the action is. One to keep and eye on is Argentina - with Wales and Ireland also in the fray.

Gert Scholtz

7 years ago #14

#13
Actually Emilia, Dean is is the one who has graced the cover page many times. I was approached by GQ too, but due my more introverted nature preferred the back-flap.

Dean Owen

7 years ago #13

#14
You are lucky @Paul Walters to have two reasonable team's to support! I embrace my Japanese and not British heritage when it comes to rugby, and they are fun to watch! (Remember Japan vs South Africa last year?) - and thanks for the awesome Sharp TV back when the Japanese made the best TVs (Korea do now).

Dean Owen

7 years ago #12

#10
You paint a graphic picture Ken-san. Thank you for that ? Great game, great memories

Paul Walters

7 years ago #11

AAAH. The game they play in heaven. Great to find rugby 'tragics' on this network. Aftet spending 15 years in Australia I abandoned my British roots and 'adopted' the Aussies ...hasn't been too bad although 14 years since we got our mits on the Bledisloe Cup . saturday will see a 'revenge' game when the Brits meet the wallabies in Melbourne to try and square the series...am I tense...you betcha! By the way Dean Owen it was probably me who bought those tickets for the 1995 final..... hope it was a great TV!!!!

Gert Scholtz

7 years ago #10

#10
Ken Boddie Ken, at last, you have given me the reason for making spelling mistakes. Cannot reecaal hew meny tymes Ei ended a game wif conkassion!

Ken Boddie

7 years ago #9

Thanks for the memories, guys! I played at school initially in the centres and latterly as full back, since I was the only one on our team who had even a slim chance of catching a high ball and had a pretty long kick to boot (pun intended). I distinctly remember the last game I had at university when playing for a very unfit team of army cadets, more infamous for our drinking prowess than rugby, against the 'Hairies' you were fit and mean. I have tortuous memories, even now, of standing beside the posts at half time vomiting my guts up, along with many of my fellow unfit teammates, and then being carried off concussed, before the end of the game, after being take out in a late tackle. 💥 I'm pretty sure I saw the whole Milky Way that afternoon, which probably explains a lot. 🤕✨

Dean Owen

7 years ago #8

I recall the first time I ever made the newspapers was as a student on the way to a Barclays Bank ATM, I was almost mobbed by people demonstrating against Apartheid and Barclays Bank's investments in S.Africa. So I went in front of the cameras and broke my ATM card there and then. That picture made front page (of some local newspaper), but I had to starve that night as I had no money!

Dean Owen

7 years ago #7

#6
1995 :)

Gert Scholtz

7 years ago #6

CityVP Manjit What great memories the 1995 World Cup brings! A watershed moment in SA's history. Will do CityVP

Gert Scholtz

7 years ago #5

CityVP Manjit. What great memories the 1985 World Cup brings! A watershed moment in SA's history. Will do CityVP.

Dean Owen

7 years ago #4

#4
That was undoubtedly the best World Cup ever, and the rebirth of a nation. Jonah Lomu thanks, and RIP. My experience of that World Cup started with securing tickets, but I could not go, so I sold them for a huge premium and with the profits bought a whopping great plasma TV in Tokyo, and had World Cup parties at my house!

CityVP Manjit

7 years ago #3

Gert, as a proud South African I would like to see a post from you about Mandela and that World Cup win he envisaged as means of bringing his country together. Playing the Enemy was a great book, and the movie Invictus maybe did not convey the full sense of what the 1995 World Cup now means to the history of South Africa. A first hand account of your experience of that moment would be very inspiring - such moments should be rekindled because these are the stories of tremendous transformation.

Gert Scholtz

7 years ago #2

#1
Juan Imaz Thank you and beBee can certainly count on us Coach Juan!

Gert Scholtz

7 years ago #1

#1
Juan Imaz Thannk you and you can certainly count on both us Coach Juan!

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